Parodies

My 3 Parodies:

1. Puppy got SNACKS (Baby Got Back Parody)
2. Grow Old with You (Adam Sandler Parody)
3. My Boy Adam(Parody of Chris Farley Tribute)

Puppy got SNACKS:

Oh, my, God Becky, look at her butt
It is so big, she looks like
One of those rap guys' girlfriends
But, ya know, who understands those rap guys?
They only talk to her, because,
She looks like a total prostitute, 'kay?
I mean, her butt, is just so big
I can't believe it's just so round, it's like out there
I mean gross, look
She's just so, black

I like big butts and I can not lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung, want to pull up tough
'Cause you notice that butt was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh baby, I want to get wit'cha
And take your picture
My homeboys tried to warn me
But with that butt you got makes (me so horny)
Ooh, Rump-o'-smooth-skin
You say you want to get in my Benz?
Well, use me, use me
'Cause you ain't that average groupie
I've seen her dancin'
To hell with romancin'
She's sweat, wet,
Got it goin' like a turbo 'Vette
I'm tired of magazines
Sayin' flat butts are the thing
Take the average black man and ask him that
She gotta pack much back
So, fellas (Yeah) Fellas (Yeah)
Has your girlfriend got the butt? (Hell yeah)
Tell 'em to shake it (Shake it) Shake it (Shake it)
Shake that healthy butt
Baby got back (L.A. fits with the Oakland booty)
Baby got back (L.A. fits with the Oakland booty)

I like 'em round, and big
And when I'm throwin' a gig
I just can't help myself, I'm actin' like an animal
Now here's my scandal
I want to get you home
And ugh, double-up, ugh, ugh
I ain't talkin' bout Playboy
'Cause silicone parts are made for toys
I want 'em real thick and juicy
So find that juicy double
Mix-a-Lot's in trouble
Beggin' for a piece of that bubble

So I'm lookin' at rock videos
Knock-kneed bimbos walkin' like hoes
You can have them bimbos
I'll keep my women like Flo Jo

A word to the thick soul sistas, I want to get with ya
I won't cuss or hit ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I want to fuck
Til the break of dawn
Baby got it goin' on
A lot of simps won't like this song
'Cause them punks like to hit it and quit it
And I'd rather stay and play
'Cause I'm long, and I'm strong
And I'm down to get the friction on
So, ladies (yeah) Ladies (yeah)
If you want to role in my Mercedes (yeah)
Then turn around, stick it out
Even white boys got to shout
Baby got back
Baby got back

Yeah, baby, when it comes to females
Cosmo ain't got nothin'
To do with my selection
Thirty six-twenty four- thirty six
Ha ha, only if she's 5'3
**Whip Noise**
So your girlfriend rolls a Honda, playin' workout tapes by Fonda
But Fonda ain't got a motor in the back of her Honda
My anaconda don't want none
Unless you've got buns, hon
You can do side bends or sit-ups
But please don't lose that butt
Some brothers want to play that hard role
And tell you that the butt ain't gol'
So they toss it and leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it
So Cosmo says you're fat
Well I ain't down with that
'Cause your waist is small and your curves are kickin'
And I'm thinkin' bout stickin'
To the beanpole dames in the magazines
You ain't it, Miss Thing
Give me a sista, I can't resist her
Red beans and rice didn't miss her
Some knucklehead tried to dis
'Cause his girls are on my list
He had game but he chose to hit 'em
And I pull up quick to get wit 'em
So ladies, if the butt is round,
And you want a triple X throw down
Dial 1-900-MIXALOT
And kick them nasty thoughts
Baby got back
Baby got back

Oh, my, god Bosco, look at her food
It is so big, it looks like
One of those fat guys' lunches
But, ya know, who understands those two-leggers?
I only sit for you, because,
Thats looks like total food coma, 'kay?
I mean, that bone, is just so UGH
I can't believe it's just so MMM, it's like meaty
I mean yum! look
It's just so, big!

I like big snacks and I can not lie
You other puppies can't deny
That when yo' person walks in with a big ol plate
And a savory thing in your face
You get sprung, want to jump up tough
'Cause you notice that crust was stuffed!
Deep in the bag she's carrying
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh baby, I just wanna moocha
And be your good poocha
My owners tried to warn me
But with that bag you got makes (me so hungry!)
Ooh, Rub-ma-smooth-skin
You say you want to be my best friend?
Well, tease me, tease me
'Cause I ain't that average pouchie
I've seen you munching'
To hell with da training'
I'll whine...pant,
You Get me goin' when I get my pets
I'm tired, and you so mean
Sayin' dry kibbles are my thing
Take the average black mutt and ask him that
He's gonna puke that back
So, Max (Yeah) Max (Yeah)
Has your masta' got the Snacks? (Hell yeah)
Tell you to shake it (Shake it) Shake it (Shake it)
Shake that waggity tail
Daddy got Snacks (Just a lil bit and I'll be your poochy)
Daddy got Snacks (Just a lil bit and I'll be your poochy)

I like 'em now, and big
And when I'm catchin' a stick
I just can't help myself, I'm actin' like an animal
Now here's your sandal
I want go home
And arf, double-up, arf, ARF!
I ain't talkin' bout Chewtoys
'Cause them yummy snacks are for good-boys
I want 'em real thick and juicy
So notice my mega sloba
This Pups's in trouble
Beggin' for only a couple

So I'm lookin' at the rest of my bros
Raggidy Cats walkin' like hobos
You can have them Fritos
I'll keep my begging like a KuJo

A word to the thick furred kittens, I just gonna chase ya
I won't growl or bit-ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I want to *Munching noise*
Til the break of dawn
This Puppy got it goin' on
A lot of cats won't like this song
'Cause them feline like to hit it and quit it
And I'd rather stay and play
'Cause I'll come fast, and I'm strong
And I'm down to get the friction on
So, Jack (yeah) Jack (yeah)
If you want to role with my Pack (yeah)
Then turn around, stick it out
Even the neutered got to shout
Doggy got Snacks
Doggy got Snacks

Yeah, buddy, when it comes to chasing tails
Bosco ain't got nothin'
To do with my distraction'
Leash Laws can sniff my butt.
Ha ha, only if youre a bad Dog
**Whip Noise**
So he throws ball at ya, playin' at park with masta'
But that old Lady got a treats in the back of her jacket
My empty tummy just want fun
Unless you've got a snack, hon
You can do lie down or sit-ups
But please don't lose this mutt (Hell No!)
Some puppers want to play that bad role
And tell you that aint the goal
Your Humans toss it, and you leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it
So your owner says you're fat
Well I ain't down with that
'Cause big or small, and your mooch skills are kickin'
And I'm thinkin' bout licking'
To the intact dames and kennel Queen
You ain't it, Miss Bailey
Give me my masta, I can't resist her
Red beans and rice didn't miss her
Some knuckleheads growl and bark
'But Fido this is my Park
You had game but he chose to hump 'em
And I pull up quick to get all of 'em
So puppie, if your butts on the ground,
And you want a treat then throw down
Dial 1-900-SNACKS-A-LOT
And lick them nasty nuts
Doggy got Snacks
Doggy got Snacks

Grow Old with You:

Grow Old with You:

Good afternoon everyone were flying at 26,000 feet moving up to 30,00 feet and we've got clear skies all the way to las vegas.
And right now were bringing you some in-flight entertainment one of our first class passengers would like to sing you a song inspired by one of our coach passengers.
And seeming as we let our first class passengers do pretty much whatever they want here he is...

I wanna make you smile,
Whenever you're sad.
Carry you around when your arthritis is bad.
All I wanna do,
Is grow old with you.

I'll get you medicine,
When your tummy aches.
Build you a fire if the furnace breaks.
Oh it could be so nice,
Growin' old with you.

I'll miss you, kiss you,
Give you my coat when you are cold.
Need you, feed you.
Even let you hold the remote control.

So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink.
Put you to bed when you've had too much to drink.
Oh I could be the man,
Who grows old with you.
I wanna grow old with you.

Grow Old with You:

I met you 20 years ago
And we talked all night
You drank me under the table
Yeah, it was love at first sight
I knew right then and there
I'd grow old with you

I said I'd tell you jokes
Whenever you are sad
Make you a mom if you made me a dad
Oh, it's been so much fun
Growing old with you

I love you, Foot rub you
Tell you you're the only one I'm thinking of
Make big decisions with you
Try new positions with you
Even sit and watch Fucking Eat Pray Love(Two times in a row)

Now when I'm on a diet
You take away my potatoes
Say, "Fuck all those guys" After reading Rotten Tomatoes
I hope they all die miserable deaths
As I grow old with you

You scold me, You hold me
Look the other way When I dress like a pimp
You cry to me, You lie to me
But only when you tell me
That the dick looks big

Now, we don't need a big house
We don't need any money
All we need is you and me
And Sadie and Sunny
I got everything I want
Growing old with you

Thanks for growing old with Me.

Grow Old with You:

I met 2 years ago,
when BJ got me to dance
Those eyes stared at me once
I was completely en-tranced
I knew right then and there
I wanted to grow old with you

Feed you almonds, and Stroke hair
Whenever you are hungry
'Dopt every animal that even looks at me funny
Oh, it'll be so much fun
Growing old with you

I'll love you, Foot rub you
Teach you random facts I learned today,
Make big decisions with you
Try new positions with you
Even sit and watch Fucking How to Get away with Murder

Now when I have a crazy idea
And look for support
You'll listen for a bit,
then just pray and hope I forget
As I grow old with you

You BLEED for me, You FEED me
especially when you find out I haven't eaten in days.
You cuddle me, You lie to me
But only when you tell me
That my dick looks big

Now, all we need is this house
Then we don't need any money
All we need is you, me
Bosco, Oscar and Lily
I got everything I want
Growing old with you

Thanks for growing old with Me.
And I'm sorry to every other guy here for making you look bad.
And for your lady who is about to hit you and ask you why you don't write songs about them.
Don\t worry, i'll help you.

My Boy Chris Farley:

The first time I saw him, he was sweeter than shit.
Plaid jacket and belt too tight, he wasn't even doin' a bit.
Then he carwheeled around the room and slow danced with the cleaning lady.
He was a one-man party.
You know I'm talkin' about, I'm talkin' about my friend Chris Farley.
-
On "Saturday Night", may man would always deliver.
Whether he was the Bumble Bee Girl or livin' in a van down by the river.
He loved the Bears and Ditka, danced at Chippendale's with Swayze, when they replaced his coffee with Folger's, he went fuckin' crazy.
The sexiest Gap girl and Meatloaf in the band, without him, there'd be no lunch lady in "Lunch Lady Land".
You know I'm thinkin' about, I'm thinkin' about my friend Chris Farley.
-
After a show, he's stick a quart of Jack and stick the bottle right up his ass.
But hung over as hell, that Catholic boy'd always show up to morning Mass.
We'd tell him, "Slow down, you'll end up like Belushi and Candy." He'd say, "Those guys are my heroes-that's all fine and dandy".
I ain't makin' that shit up, that's the truth about my boy Chris Farley.
-
I saw him in the office cryin' with his headphones on, listenin' to a KC and the Shunshine Band song
I said, "Buddy, how in the hell is that makin' you so sad?" Then he laughed and said, "Just thinkin' about my dad"
-
The last we big hang we had was at Timmy Meadows' wedding party.
We laughed our balls off all night long, all because of Farley.
But a few months later, the party came to an end.
We flew out to Madison to bury our friend.
Nothin' was harder than sayin' good bye, 'cept watchin' Chris' father have his turn to cry.
-
Hey buddy, life's moved on but you still bring us so much joy.
Make my kids laugh with your YouTube clips or "Tommy Boy".
And when they ask me who's the funniest guy I ever knew, I tell 'em hands down, without a doubt it's you.
Yeah, I miss hangin' out, watchin' you tried to get laid.
But most of all, I miss watchin' you fuck with Spade.
You're a legend like you wanted, but I still wish you were here with me.
And we were gettin' on a plane to shoot "Grown Ups 3".
Yeah, life ain't the same without you boy.
And that's why I'm singin' about, I'm singin' about my friend Chris Farley.
And if we make enough noise, maybe he'll hear us.
Give it up for the great.
Chris Farley.

My Boy Adam:

The first time I saw him, let face it, he was dressed like PUNK,
Black Leather jacket, blue jeans, and more than half DRUNK.
He was super excited, never knew why, on about some crazy idea. I eventually stopped listening.
Never figured out if we was part-deaf, or just super excited CHUM
You know who I'm talkin' about, I'm talkin' about my friend ADAM
-
His Birthday Party were Epic, he'd always deLIVER,
Bringing us all together, Toasting and punishing his LIVER!
He'd eat all our left-overs without FUSS. He travelled the world with a lucky few of US,
Trump, Bloody Zombie, Bride, Redneck, Killer Clown, a 7-foot dog, or the Guy from KISS
But If Bosco couldn't come, there was something a-MISS
Couldn't cook to save his life so it was non-stop DINNERS
Dam Straight, you know I'm talking about that Adam WITHERS
-
Some of us have a mid-life crisis, he kept is going
Pouring concrete till 3am when it was snowing.
When we needed a hand, he come fucking RUNNING,
When he wondered how he'd die, and I can he never saw this COMING,
Rarely finished the projects, he sure did START
A one-man party, but with a huge HEART

He loved his dog, his neices, and every last one of us

Sad puppy commericial, and he'd sure as hall cry, That guy lived three times as much as us, and we all know why.

He always had energy,

Endless links to AdamWithers.SEE-AYE

I'm off to hug Bosco, he downloaded himself into that little GUY

Up late at night, he ate like-never, but we all thought we'd have him forever
Make this world a little bit better

He knew his life would one day come to an END

He dance with my mom, and I'd be stuck with with theirs
Never introducing people, assuming we'd all met

Amateur Contractor, mechanic, and vet
His Birthdays were epic, and we drank all night in stupid costumes

My only regret is I couldn't throw him a bachelor Party

Walks in the park took hours as he bent down to pet every dam dog.
Partying in til 5am, bed till noon, and slept like a log,

Belting out the karaoke and busting uncoordinate groove
Quick survey, How many of you did Adam help move?

Some had to have been fibs, never got to hassle Tom about breaking his ribs.

He didn't work for "the man" but build 3 houses, and helped with ours.
So much of a dog, I'm shocked he didn't chase cars

Tried his best to be that fun-uncle for his nieces
But He wouldn't want all falling to pieces

First to say "you can fix it together" when something broke.
We never knew: Serious idea, or complete joke

Always the first to send us a link
Always the first to yell out YMCA

Keeping us sharp with random trivia we didn't ask
Always asking for the next task

He'd tell us "Don't take life too seriously, I sure fucking don't".
But no-show your Wedding or Birthday, he sure as hell won't

Belting out embarassing songs at Karaoke.
Seen that guy take on &&&, he was always hokie-dokie.

You know I'm thinkin' about, I'm thinkin' about my friend Adam

But waking him up was as hell, but once you did, it was go-go-go

Hair so Scisors

Seen him chuck pitchers, and I'd he wouldn't puke
This was Adam our loud, loveable Kook

He'd never be happy till his whole home was cramling with critters
He'd feed us gross shots, and I'd get the jitters
I ain't makin' that shit up, that's the truth about my boy Adam Withers

In the face of every damn dog I see our walks,
But sometimes I just miss our cheap wings and long talks

I often caught him cryin' at random commercial, not even controversial

A man with few regrets, and though he knows we are sad
I said, "Buddy, how in the hell is that makin' you so sad?" He siffled and said, "Just thinkin' about my dad"

The last we big hang we had was at 40th Birthday last autumn
We laughed our heads off all night long, all because of Adam
But a few months later, the party came to an end
So We all came to this park to honor our friend
Nothin' was harder than sayin' good bye,
'cept watchin' Adam' puppy have his turn to cry.

Hey buddy, our life's will move on but you'll still bring us so much joy
Yeah, life ain't the same without you boy

Give me no love for this here song, Adam wrote the whole thing, and capitized it all wrong

First guy I'd come to when I broke up with a girl/gal

He was the last one to leave at all of our parties

He lived a full life, trust me I checked the Bucketlist.
When you miss him, pet a puppy, hit a ball, visit Bosco, visit your family
Open up his facebook albums, and re-live the fun
BUt remember to make a toast to him!

And when they ask me why their dog made me cry, I say "Once about a time I knew this one guy"
Yeah, I miss hangin' out, miss those invite text,
But most of all, I miss wondering what he'd do next
You said you did everything you wanted, but I still wish you were here with me
And we were gettin' on a plane to Vegas with me

And that's why I'm singin' about, I'm singin' about my friend Adam
And if we make enough noise, and punish our livers,
Raise your glass for the best Bro
Adam Withers

STD song

It's fairly well known, in the place I call home, I like girls with an ass that is roomie.
I met an old slut, with a very large butt, she said son for ten bucks you can DO ME!
The bathroom wall said that she gave some good head, and for a good time to call her this evenin'.
I was worried though, that I just didn't know if I'd wind up with some dude named STEVEN!
I gave her a call, and we went to the mall, and we enjoyed a couple of Slurpees.
It was two days or more, I was pretty damn sore, I found out the old bag gave me HERPES!
Her hair was dyed, she didn't have a good side, she had moved her from someplace near Boston.
When I got her home, and she took off her clothes, well my cookies I just about tossed them!
Her bush went she turned, a fucking overgrown fern, in desperate need of some water.
Her elbows and knees had some scabby disease, and her mustache looked like Sergeant Slaughter!
I turned off the lights, cause if I looked at her right, I felt like my eyes would start failing.
Then I went outside, my lunch began to slide, and I vomited over a railing.
I went back inside to finish my ride, said: "Baby, it was good to know ya".
She said "Not so fast bro, There something you could know", now come here, I got something to show ya.
Her skin was all wrong, up next to her thong, it was red and it looked irritated.
I felt an itch on my crank, and my heart, it just sank, oh damn, I should have just masturbated!
Does anyone know, where the love of god goes, when you pee and it feels just like acid?
It was two weeks ago, that I slept with that ho, and my penis, it just stays flaccid!
You might like this song, and you might sing along, and you may even think that it's funny.
But you wouldn't though if whenever you go, there's a discharge that is white and real runny!
Now I've fanned out and spanned, all across this great land, From Maine all the way to the Rockies.
My Penile steams, like a cappuccino machine, and it keeps burning holes in my JOCKEYS!
I felt the old hole in Detroit's they say, that it's doubtful that anyone's carin'.
Her career-high, she banged 91 guys, the hood of her Chrysler LeBaron.
The doctors all say the smell won't go away, like the Shrimp that was sent here from China.
Trust that I cleaned, I even used Listerine, but my nuts still smell like Filthy VAGINA.