Childhood Nursery Rhymes

Songs (Below):

• Quartermaster's Store:
• Assumption Song- Farmers Daughter
• Miss Susie:
• 1819 Blueberry street
• Throw them out the window
• Sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G.
• I see London, I see France, I see ____'s underpants
• Down in the valley
• Cinderella, dressed in yellow
• Johnny gave me apples,
• I like coffee, I like tea,
• Johnny gave me apples, Johnny gave me pears.
• Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear, Turn around
• Spanish Dancer

Quartermaster's Store:

There are rats, rats, rats, big as alley cats
In the store, in the store,
There are rats, rats, rats, big as alley cats
In the Quartermaster's Store

Chorus:

My eyes are dim I cannot see,
I have not brought my specs with me
I have not brought my spectacles with me

Alternates:

Snakes ... Big as garden rakes
Mice ... Running through the rice
Owls ... Shredding paper towels
Beetles ... Running on the needles
Snails ... Crawling on the nails
Ravens ... Acting rather craven
Ant-e-lopes ... Using all the rope
Foxes ... In all the boxes (or: Stuffed in little boxes)
Beavers ... Wielding rusty cleavers
Bears ... Running down the stairs (or: With curlers in their hair)
Buf-fa-loes ... Eating all the dough (or: With hair between their toes)
Bob-bob-whites ... Wearing silken tights
Eagles ... Chasing little beagles
Beagles ... Being chased by eagles
Fleas ... Crawling on our knees
Mer-chan-dise ... Sold at twice the price
Plat-y-pi ... Eating all the pie
Hip-hip-pos ... Stepping on our toes
Tuna ... Running 'round the room-a
Rac-rac-coons ... Stealing all the spoons
Gold-gold-finch ... Sitting on the winch
Crocks ... Eating all the lox
All-i-gators ... Eating Nilla Wafers
Trout ... Causing lots of grout
Deer ... Drinking all the coffee
Ice ... If you're really nice
Dip-lo-dacus ... Causing quite a fracas
SPLs ... Making funny smells
Bees ... Buzzing 'round the keys
Turkey ... Eating all the jerky
Al-lo-saurs... Being quite a bore
Quar-ter-masters ... Hanging from the rafters
Ants . . . wearing Wood Badge tartan pants
Apes . . . eating all the grapes
Beans . . . as big as submarines
Bees . . . with little knobby knees
Butter . . . running in the gutter
Bread . . . with great big lumps like lead
Cakes . . . that give us tummy aches
Cheese . . . that makes you want to sneeze (or: with kilts and hairy knees)
Coke . . . enough to make you choke
Eggs . . . with scary chicken legs
Flour . . . that will give you super power
Flies . . . swarming round the pies
Fishes . . . washing all the dishes
Goats . . . eating all the oats
Gravy . . . enough to float the navy
Hats . . . being worn by hairless rats
Kippers . . . in little furry slippers
Lard . . . they sell it by the yard
Leaders . . . slapping at the skeeters
Meat . . . smelling like [Name's/Sergeant's] feet
Moths . . . eating through the cloths
Pepsi . . . that gives you apoplexy
Roaches . . . sleeping in the coaches
Scouts . . . eating brussel sprouts
Soot . . . they grow it by the foot
Turtles . . . wearing rubber girdles

Assumption Song- Farmers Daughter:

There was an old farmer who lived on a rock
He sat in the meadow just shaking his
Fist at some boys who were down by the crick
Their feet in the water, their hands on their
Marbles and play things at a half passed four
There came a young lady who looked like a
Pretty, young preacher
She sat on the grass, she pulled up her dress
And she showed them her
Ruffles, and laces and white fluffy duck
She said she was learning a new way to
Bring up her children, so they would not spit
While the boys in the barnyard were shoveling
Refuse, and litter from yesterday's hunt
While the girl in the meadow was rubbing her
Eyes at the fellow, down by the dock
He looked like a man with a sizable
Home in the country, with a big fence out front
If he asked her politely, she'd show him her
Little pet dog, who was subject to fits
And maybe she'd let him grab hold of her
Small, tender hands with a movement so quick
And then she'd bend over and suck on his
Candy, so tasty made of butterscotch
And then he'd spread whip cream all over her
Cookies that she had left out on her shelf
If you think this is dirty
You can go f*ck yourself!

Miss Susie:

Miss Susie had a steamboat,
The steamboat had a bell,
Miss Susie went to heaven,
The steamboat went to...

Hello Operator,
Please dial Number 9,
And if you disconnect me,
I'll kick you from...

Behind the 'frigerator,
There lay a piece of glass,
Miss Susie sat upon it,
And cut her little...

Ask me no more questions,
I'll tell you no more lies,
The boys are in the bathroom,
Zipping down their...

Flies are in the backyard,
The bees are in the park,
Miss Susie and her boyfriend
Are kissing in the D-A-R-K
Dark, dark, dark

Dark is like a movie,
A movie's like a show.
A show is like a TV screen,
And that is all I know

I know I know my mother,
I know I know my pa.
I know I know my sister
With the forty acre bra.

Brother's like a sister,
A sister's like an aunt.
An aunt is like a relative
Who likes to rave and rant.

I wish I had a nickel
I wish I had a dime
I wish I had a boyfriend
Who kissed me all the time!

My Ma gave me a nickel
My Pa gave me a dime.
My Sister gave me a boyfriend,
Who'd kiss me all the time

My Ma took back the nickel,
My Pa took back the dime.
My Sister took back her boyfriend,
and gave me Frankenstein!

He made me wash the dishes,
He made me wash the floors,
He made me wash his underwear,
So I kicked him out the door

I kicked him over London,
I kicked him over France.
I kicked him to Hawaii,
where he learned to Hula dance!

My mothers like Godzilla,
My fathers like King Kong.
My sister is the stupid one
That taught me this dumb song.

Hello operator,
Please give me number ten.
And if you disconnect me,
I'll sing this song again!

1819 Blueberry street:

My mother your mother live across the street
1819 Blueberry street
Every night they have a fight
and this is what they say
Boy's are rotten
made out of cotton
Girls are handy
made out of candy
Boys go to Jupiter
to get more stupider
Girls go to Mars
to get more candy bars
Boys drink whiskey
to get more frisky
Girls drink Pepsi
to get more sexy
Icky Icky soda pop
Icky Icky you
Icky Icky soda pop
a boy loves you
1...2...3...4...

Throw them out the window:

(You sing nursery rhythms and alter the last line to throwing them out the window) Little bo peep has lost her sheep
And doesn’t know where to find them
Little no peep has lost her sheep
And when we find them we’ll throw them out the window
The window
The 7th story window
If you don’t know what your about
We’ll throw you out the window

Jack be nimble
Jack be quick
Jack jumps over them candlestick
And we throw him out the window

The window
The 7th story window
If you don’t know what your about
We’ll throw you out the window
Etc

Sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G:

[Name] and [Name]
sitting in a tree,
K-I-S-S-I-N-G.
First comes love,
then comes marriage,
then comes the baby
in a baby carriage!

I see London, I see France, I see ____'s underpants:

I see London
I see France
I see ____'s underpants
Miss Susie:

Down in the valley:

Down in the valley
Where the green grass grows,
There sat Janey
Sweet as a rose.
Along came Johnny
And kissed her on the cheek.
How many kisses
Did she get this week?
1, 2, 3, 4, 5...

Cinderella, dressed in yellow:

Cinderella, dressed in yella
Went upstairs to kiss her fellow
Made a mistake
And kissed a snake
How many doctors
Did it take?
1, 2, 3, 4, 5...

Cinderella dressed in blue,
Went upstairs to tie her shoe,
By mistake she tied a knot,
How many knots will she make?
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, etc.

Cinderella dressed in green,
Went downtown to buy a ring,
By mistake she bought a fake,
How many days before it breaks?
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, etc.

Johnny gave me apples:

Johnny gave me apples,
Johnny gave me pears.
Johnny gave me 50 cents
To kiss him on the stairs.

I gave him back his apples
, I gave him back his pears.
I gave him back his 50 cents
And kicked him down the stairs.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5...

I like coffee, I like tea:

I like coffee,
I like tea,
I'd like for Janey
To come in with me.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5...

Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear,Turn around:

Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear,Turn around.
Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear,Touch the ground.
Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear,Touch your shoe.
Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear,That will do.
Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear,Go upstairs.
Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear,Say your prayers.
Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear,Turn out the light.
Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear,Say good night!

Spanish Dancer:

Not last night but the night before,
Twenty-four robbers came knocking at my door
I asked them what they wanted,
And this is what they said:
Spanish Dancer, do the splits.
Spanish Dancer, do the twist.
Spanish Dancer, turn around.
Spanish Dancer, touch the ground.
Spanish Dancer, go out the back.
Spanish Dancer, please come back.
Spanish Dancer, read a book.
Spanish Dancer, do not look.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5...

Down by the bay:

Down by the bay
Down by the bay
Where the watermelons grow
Where the watermelons grow
Back to my home
Back to my home
I dare not go
I dare not go
For if I do
For if I do
My mother would say
My mother would say
Have you ever seen a duck driving a truck?

Videos:

Childhood songs: Honorable Mentions:

• Miss Molly Had a Dolly
• Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack. All dressed in black, black, black